What Makes A Malaysian A Malaysian?

1. A typical young Malaysian can name all the players from a top English Premier League club, but ask him to name one football player from Malaysia, he cannot!


2. When StreamyX come, you complain StreamyX too slow. When Maxis Broadband come, you complain Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax come, you complain Wimax too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX still the best lah.


3. When highway toll price increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go Starbucks buy RM10 coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.


4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall and there's SALE, run from one end of 1Utama to the other, that one NO COMPLAINT.


5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.


6. You have a parent who forces you to take science stream in high school, study engineering in Uni, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and do commerce.


7. You know someone who can specially develop an angmoh accent when speaking to an American / British / Australian.


8. You complain against the government in kopitiam, you talk loud loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs, you also talk loud loud. Attend ceremah by DAP, you shout loud loud. Then when Opposition organise a protest and ask you to go, you dun wan. Scared later kena tangkap by ISA.


9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people below queuing up last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.


10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.


11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.


12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.


13. When a Chinese student won a scholarship, you say 'Wah! Very clever hor?' When a Malay student won a scholarship, you say 'Aiya! Of course lah! He Malay mah!'


14. When an angmoh stranger kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you very happy. When a Malaysian guy kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him in face.

Mr. Bean

1) BRAIN TUMOR:

Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.

Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)

Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?

Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?

Doctor: Then why are you so happy?

Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!




2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:

Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?

Mr. Bean: 9

Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?

Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!



3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:

Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.

Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?

Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!




4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:

Friend: What are you looking at?

Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.

Friend: Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?

Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!


5) Marriage:

Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?

Mr. Bean: 16

Friend: Why?

Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4 worse.


Jokes Of Mr. Bean

6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:

Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?

Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture.

Friend: What tape did you took anyway?

Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.


7)DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:

Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom's dead.

Friend: condolence, my friend.

(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder

Friend: what now?

Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!


8) MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:

Colleague: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.

Mr. Bean: That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.


9) Spelling lesson:

Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful.....is it one c or two c?

Mr. Bean: Make it three c to be sure!

Heavenly earth

All These Pictures I See in Yuh4n's blog.Highly recommended you all see his blog.Heaven is a colourful place that can startle you.Believe it.

Edge of Glacier

Golden Maple Leaf

Disney Castle

Beauty of Tibet

Windmills of Holland

Neuschwannstein, King Ludwig's Castle in Bavaria , Germany

Saltzburg Austria - the most beautiful city we have ever seen.

The beauty of Antarctica

Autumn in Germany

Tundra

Cherry Blossoms Japan

The Moon and Star on Earth

Deep Autumn

Breithorn Peak ( Switzerland )

The Purple Romance

Come (Make a wish)

Lavender at the Foot of the Mountain

MirrorLake

Earthbound Rainbow

Blue Sea

The Night Scene of Eiffel Tower

Lavender Farm

Lavender Farm and Tree

Teenage life

I like this song now.It suits my mood.Tomorrow 14-2-09 is 2009 year Valentine's day but it not concern me at all as we do not have any relationship for now.This year I'm alone too.Nothing change.Same lifestyle,same hair cut,same friends all still the same.Talking about friends one of my closet friend now change other class and we no always keep in touch.Just become normal friend.Missing.

Teenager's Vexation Part 2

I am giving some method to solve the Teenager's Vexation.
Just relax.Everyone can do it just need follow some instruction.
I not force everyone must follow my way.You have your own way.Just be creative.
Following my methods will get some benefit:
1) No mark will deducted
2) Answers are reasonable
3) Easy
4) Can answer faster
5) No formula to be memorized
6) No calculation
7) No need pass up white sheet exam paper
8) Just need relax
9) No stress at all
10)No wasting times at all

However most of people do not like my methods because....







No marks are added because all answers are wrong.

Teenager's Vexation

Vexation is worry.Worry is still worry.Nothing can change about it.After seeing this would you laugh,would you flash back to your teenager's life.The author is too stress stress till this condition.Can't imagine right?Now I live in a stressful life also.So busy.Busy till no time.I can see the seconds,minutes and hours passing me everyday but i cant feel it.No feeling at all.Competition coming.Busier now.I want go into the world that full of freedom.I love freedom.No chain ties me at all.Can fly or go anywhere you want.No stress.No worries.No vexation.Just me alone.Let's me enjoy the freedom that I desire.Can?

The 9th day of Chinese New Year

The 9th day of Chinese New Year actually is our Hokkien New Year (Thni Kong Seh)HeHe most of the Penang Chinese people are Hok Kein so no need go to school today^^
here come the story: The folk tale has it that the Hokkiens escaped mistreatment by ruthless army in ancient China by seeking refuge in a sugarcane plantation. They emerged unharmed on the 8th day of Chinese New Year. The birthday of the Jade Emperor. Hence the New Year of Hokkiens.
Hehe sugarcane help us escape so we buy food,fruits and sugarcane as offering to the Jade Emperor God

Just for fun

A Japanese man was in a hurry to go to the KLIA airport, so he took a Proton taxi. The taxi driver took his sweet time driving within the speed limit but the Jap was getting impatient.

The following is their conversation on the way to the airport.

A Toyota Camry overtook the taxi.....zoom....

Jap: Look ...look .... Toyota !! ...very fast!!!.... Made in Japan !
Proton...no good.... Made in Malaysia .
Driver: yah....

After a few minutes a Nissan overtook the taxi....zoom.
Jap: look.... Look.... Nissan!!!..... Very good!! Very fast! Made in Japan !
Proton.... No good.... Made in Malaysia
Driver: yah....yah...

After a few minutes a Honda overtook the taxi...zooom. !
Jap: look.... Look... Honda!!.... Very GOOD!!....very fast!!....made in Japan !

Proton...no good...made in Malaysia

Driver: yah...yah...yah....!

Arriving at the airport. Jap going to pay the taxi driver.
Jap: How much?
Driver: RM150/-
Jap: Oh... Very expensive..... You overcharge!!
Driver: Noooo .... Look .... Look ..... Sony meter!!....very good!!....very fast!.... Made in Japan !